Miscommunication

"Your cousin is hosting a lunch next Wednesday, dress nice." my mom says on the phone. As the date gets closer I begin to realize I may not be able to make it to the lunch, but it's just a lunch right? I don't get to see my cousin very often so I decide to make time to see him, and I clear out my schedule. It's Wednesday and I remember my mom telling me to dress nice, but I didn't really want to dress up so I put on a park of navy blue slacks,  a white blouse, and a black blazer. As I get to the restaurant the host asks me if I was here for the wedding party. Confused, I politely corrected him and just asked him where the rest of the party was seated. He took me to the back of the restaurant, into a secluded room. As I walk in, the first thing I see is my cousin in a suit, sitting next to a women dressed in white. A white wedding dress. This was my cousin's wedding reception, it was not an ordinary lunch. I walk up to my cousin and his new wife and congratulate them. I see my brother and the rest of my cousins and I sit next to them. Shocked, I asked my brother when they were engaged, and more importantly when they got married.  He tells me they were engaged a month ago and they got married today. I was not expecting to come to a wedding reception or else I would have dressed much nicer. I sat there, absorbing all of the news. I probably took me an hour to finally accept the fact that he was actually married. Of course I was happy for him. I was so embarrassed because it seemed like I was the only one who did not know this.

Yiyun Li

Something I always enjoyed as a child was Barbies. I liked them because I could customize their hair, clothes, and shoes. I didn't have nice things growing up, so playing with Barbies that had a bunch of clothes was the next best thing. I also loved their blonde hair, blue eyes, and slim body. I would sit in my room for hours pretending to talk to my Barbies. I liked to use my imagination and come up with different life scenarios that I always dreamed about. I think playing with Barbies was my escape. I could be anything I wanted and I could do whatever I wanted to. However, I realize that Barbies are not as great as I thought they were. Barbies give young girls unrealistic perceptions of body image. At a young age, girls subconsciously idolize Barbies. Barbies are typically light skinned, blonde hair, blue eyed women with extremely thin waists. This body image does not help young girls improve their self confidence and I know as a kid I struggled with self confidence.  

Going Home

The leather feels warm to the touch as my left hand grips the steering wheel. I can smell the fresh mountain air as it's ventilated into the cabin of my car through the air conditioning. Although the change in altitude is gradual, the familiar pressure in my ears begins to build with every mile. The glow from my GPS becomes more prominent as the sun makes it's final dive into the west. Two more hours. Two more hours of light swaying as the road pulls my car down its winding path. Another left, I feel my seat push against my right shoulder. Another right, now the left shoulder. With the mountain view slipping over the horizon with the sun, the weight of boredom begins to pull at my eye lids. My mind begins to drift as my eyes remain focused to car ahead. I see the windshield beginning to fog up. It begins to snow and the winding roads become more dangerous. The fear builds up as I pull over. As I open the car door, a rush of cold air immediately bites my skin. I take the chains out of the trunk. The weight of the chains, and the temperature of the freezing cold air is too much for me to handle. I can taste the snow as I kneel to the floor to put the chains on.

This is Water

Something I take for granted in life is my parents. I know no matter what I do and the wrong decisions I make in life, they will always be there for me no matter what. Moving to college, i communicate less and less, and I barley ever go home and visit them. However, when I need something, thats when I would give them a call or go home and visit them. I think everyone take their parents for granted because they don't want to be lectured and yelled at, so they just blow them off. (Thats kind of like my case). Of course now that I am 21 years old, I miss my parents and I appreciate everything they have done for me, and all the sacrifices they have made for me. It's like electricity. No one realizes how important electricity is in our daily lives. People leave their lights, tvs, and air conditioners on all day without hesitation, but once there is a blackout or we lose our electricity, we will then realize how important electricity is for us. We think our parents are going to be here for us, forever, but we won't really appreciate them to the fullest until it's too late and they are gone.

Sanctuaries & Spawning Grounds for the Most Radical Ideas

One of my sanctuaries and spawning groups for ideas is meditation and yoga. I hold them close to my heart. This is a lifestyle choice that keeps me cool, calm, and collected. I was introduced to meditation during my freshmen year of college. Mediation is to think deeply or focus one's mind for a period of time, in silence or with the aid of chanting, for religious or spiritual purposes or as a method of relaxation. Meditation is something I can anytime through out my day, and it has drastically changed my life. Recently I have been stressed out about school, and my future career path, and I meditated for an hour. During my meditation, I was able to clear my mind and think things through. I don't really know how to explain it, but everything just came together. I was able to prioritize and after meditating, I knew what to do. Another thing that helps me is yoga. Like meditation, it helps me clear my mind, but this also includes physical activity. If I have the time, I would practice yoga because it helps me feel refreshed and ready for what life have to offer. Because yoga requires movement and physical activity, it makes me more focused. I like meditation and yoga because it gives me time to myself, and I can be honest with myself. 

Letter to mom

Dear Mom,
Hi mom, I just wanted to keep you updated with my life and what is going on with me. I recently got a new job at an accounting firm. I noticed at work while I was processing tax forms that need approval and verification for everything that I did. I came home and I was thinking about why that was the case. I thought back to when I was in middle school and I think it was because I was bullied a lot growing up. I don't know if you know this but I'm dealing with a lot of insecurities and low self esteem. I think middle school really changed my life, and the way I see life. I was put down constantly because of my ethnicity, and because I was introverted. Being constantly put down for an entire school year rally had an affect on my self confidence. I didn't feel like I was good enough, and til this day I am still seeking approval from others. Also, a fault of mine is that I take things too personally and I care too much about what others think about me. I know if I was confident in myself that these things would not matter. I'm still working on my confidence by this experience definitely has changed the way I viewed others, and myself. I think one good outcome of it is, because I care so muc about what others think of me, I started to be more considerate of other people's feelings and needs. I put others before myself and I like helping people. I like making others happy.

Creature

Imagine yourself in a dark cave, theres water dripping, and mysterious noises coming from deeper inside. It is pitch black but you continue to explore this mysterious cave. As you walk, you feel a rough texture on your arm, kind of like the skin of a scaley lizard. It doesn't phase you because you assume it's the wall of the cave. All of a sudden you hit a dead end, you light a match to figure out where you are. The first spark of the match, you catch a glimpse of the most terrifying eyes, the size of basketballs. The rough texture was the creature's entire body. The 2nd spark of the match, you see it's legs. It's legs were feathery, and had extremely sharp claws. So sharp, it pierced your skin without you even noticing.  Finally, you light the match and you are face to face with this creature. You've never seen something so ugly. The skin on it's face looks burnt, it doesn't have a nose, only 2 holes to breathe. Inside it's mouth, it has teeth shaper than it's claws. You notice blood inside it's mouth. The match goes out and it's pitch black again.